


Life is Just a Killing Field, Who's to Care How Early You Start?

by Agent_Nevada_01



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, BUT IT'S THERE..., Gen, It lead to his first kill, Jeremy had a really bad childhood, Jeremy-centric, Murder, Past Child Abuse, Trans Jack, a throw away line..., it's like
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-15
Updated: 2018-11-15
Packaged: 2019-08-23 23:21:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16628429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Agent_Nevada_01/pseuds/Agent_Nevada_01
Summary: While unwinding with some drinks with the crew, Jeremy tell a story he kept hidden since he was 13. The story of his first kill.In case you didn’t read the tags, trigger warning; Attempted Rape, Cannon-Typical Violence.They are both more alluded to then anything.A guy talks about what he wants to do, and he gets stabbed a bit but nothing overly descriptive. I just wanted to cover all my bases.Also, I edited it some. Fix things up to (hopefully) read a bit more smoothly.





	Life is Just a Killing Field, Who's to Care How Early You Start?

**Author's Note:**

> To be completely honest... I never expected to write this... Or at the very least finish it. I had this sort of idea floating around my head for a while. 
> 
> The reason I wrote it is because I wrote a play. In the play I have a character I based off of Jeremy Dooley, and I wrote a pretty complex back story, most of which didn't get put in. 
> 
> So, I thought, why not just make a short story and apply the back story to the character my character is based off of and voila! A story gets finished.
> 
> Enjoy!

The night started like any other night of oversharing does for them. Most everyone had something to drink, save Ryan, and they were all a little bit more loose lipped than normal. So, Ryan, sitting next to Jeremy and never one to pass up on opportunity to get blackmailing information from everyone, suggested they play truth or dare. Eventually, however, it dissolved into “the last person who answered a question asked the next one to figure out who had the worst childhood.” A game they had yet to fall into.

To everyone’s surprise, Ryan, arguably the most fucked up person in the group, had a fairly normal childhood.

“Mom was sick… I need a quick way to make money. Robbing banks seemed to work well.”

Gavin had come from a wealthy home, with parents who ignored him and kicked him out when he came out as Bi, giving him enough money to get out of England and to Los Santos.

“Best decision of my life. Never would have met Turney otherwise.”

Geoff's story was partially from a fairy tale.

“Mom died, dad remarried a bitch, he died, and my stepmom was a dick till I moved out for college. Haven't seen her since.”

Jack faced so many issues and bigots in her hometown.

“I got my revenge on anyone who didn't accept that I was a girl.”

And Michael was born into this life.

“My parents were low level grunts in the gang that controlled the area I was born in. Hard to avoid it when it's what you're fed as a child.”

But the more they got into it though, the more they realized that Jeremy, young, charming, no-fashion-sense, Jeremy, had one of the worse backstories.

“I'd been bounced around in foster care since I was 3…”

“The best houses I had were ones wit adults who ignored me because they were overcrowded.”

“I finally managed to run away for real at 12.”

“I had a house that locked me in a hope chest when I was 9 for 3 days because my bus was home 10 minutes late the day they left for a business trip. They let me out when they got home.”

“The worst home I had been in, I was 11, it was just me and the guy there liked to think of new ways to… punish me… when I made what he deemed to be a mistakes. Once he… He tied me to a rafter in his attic… I don't even remember what I did… But about once a day, from what I could tell at least, he’d come up, get on a ladder and feed me… give me a bit to drink… And no matter how much I begged and cried… How much told him I was sorry, or that I learned my lesson… He’d just laugh and tell me ‘one more day, just till I know you learned your lesson.’ I was there 2 and a half weeks, till my social worker came for a surprise visit and couldn't find me… She called the police and they eventually found me unconscious in the attic… Still can't stand heights because of it.”

And as shocking as that all was, it was the most recent confession that really had everyone reeling. Something they hadn’t expected.

“I was 13 the first time I killed anyone.”

“I'm sorry… Did you say you killed someone at 13?” Ryan asked him. It was hard to believe that Jeremy had killed so young. A child who had been dealt a bad hand that, apparently, didn't get better when he ran away.

“Yeah…” Jeremy had gone a little red, embarrassed about his dark past. “I mean… I should probably explain…”

“Not if you don't want to.” Said Jack, always one to consider how a story could fuck up a person's mental health when they got into these drunk sharing sessions. “It sounds bad. We can leave if you don't want to bring it up anymore “

Jeremy thought about it for a moment. It was hard to think about. The memory still gave in nightmares every now and again.

"No one will judge you if you say no," Ryan murmured into his ear, as if sensing his apprehension on the topic. "It seems… unpleasant." 

“No…" Jeremy said. "I… I probably should… I've never actually talked about it… And I… I think it'll be… good… for me. You see… I had made it Los Santos with next to no problem…”

* * *

Jeremy had made it in Los Santos with next to no issues, hopping on freight train after freight train until he made it to the opposite end of the US from Boston. It was really just a coincidence that he ended up in the most crime riddled city. Lucky for me, it it easy to slip into the crowd and go unnoticed by anyone. He was small from nearly 9 years of poor and inconsistent nutrition, being told by the doctor for his last mandatory check up it was unlikely he would grow to be over 5’6” and by the time he was 13 he was just over 5’2” and had transitioned from pick pocketing into small time convenience store hit. 

He was proud of himself. He had been going for nearly a year and a half and hadn’t killed anyone yet.

Then he had no choice.

* * *

It was a night, late in December, around 9:30, that it happened.

Jeremy had just hit a convenience store on the opposite side of town, then he normally hit, and he needed to get home, soon. He could tell from the clouds above him that it was going to snow and he hoped to be across town to the bridge he normally slept under before it started. Unlucky for him, however, 10 minutes into the walk the snow started, light at first but picking up quickly. Jeremy was dressed in his warmest clothes, a long sleeved shirt that was a tad too big on him, a mid fall sweater and a pair of jeans with holes in the knees, that dragged on the ground. He was freezing. It was a few minutes after the snow started that someone’s car stopped beside him. 

“Hey kid,” Called out the man who was driving, “You need a ride somewhere? It’s awfully cold out there and you don’t seem to be dressed for the weather.”

Jeremy considered his answer while studying the man in front of him. He appeared to be in his 50s with dark brown hair that was beginning to grey, a slightly wrinkled face, and sleepy dark brown eyes. He didn’t look all too dangerous, so Jeremy decided he would take the man up on his offer.

“Sure!” He said, entering the car. “Thanks so much, I didn’t mean to be out this late… Or this far from home.”

“It’s no problem. Where do you need me to drop you off?”

“The convenience store on Niland Avenue in Sandy Shores. My mom is working and I promised I would be there for when she got off. Time kinda… Got away from me…” 

“Sounds good, I’m Howard, by the way.”

“Kevin.” Jeremy told him. He felt slightly bad about lying. Both about his name and where he is going, but he didn’t want to tell this man to drop him off at a bridge so he could sleep under it. He refused to let himself be thrown back into foster care if that man decided to bring him to a police station, or told the police that there was a homeless kind living under a bridge. This was the safer option.

They started driving in the direction of Sandy Shores, however, after about 10 minutes, he began to notice that they had made to to Sandy Shores, but they were going in the opposite direction from where Jeremy asked to be let out.

“Uhh… Howard, sir… This is the wrong direction…” 

“Oh, yeah, sorry, I meant to mention that I had to pick up a couple of chairs for my brother before 10.” Howard told him, with a little smirk on his face. 

Jeremy started feeling a little off. This man had seemed really kind before… but now, Jeremy had a feeling he should have just walked. 

“You know… We aren't that far from my mom's work… I can walk, truly. Thanks for the ride.”

“Nonsense,” He said with a chuckle, as they got farther and farther from the bulk of the town. “It won't take long, and it's way too cold to be walking around outside without a proper jacket.”

Howard turned into an empty lot, between a couple of buildings Jeremy knew were abandoned.

“Besides, I've seen you around, sleeping under bridges, robbing stores, stealing wallets from poor unsuspecting people,” He dropped all pretenses of kindness, a dark malicious sort of husky tone taking over in its place. “I’ve been watching you for a while, Jeremy. Do you have any idea what that does to someone? Seeing how you shiver in the dead of night? Or the absolute control you hold when rob a convenience store? How it makes a guy wonder what it would feel like having those deft little hands roaming all over my-”

“Stop!” Jeremy cried out. He felt like throwing up, this was not how he had expected the night to go, not by a long shot. “I don't like this! You can have my money or whatever, but please! Let me leave!”

Jeremy tried the door, but it was locked. Before he could reach for the unlocking mechanism, he felt large hand wrap around his waist, pulling him back and pushing him into the back seat. Howard followed him, a smirk on his face that Jeremy knew meant that he wouldn’t get out of this on his own.

“Oh, come now boy. I promise to make this good for you.” Jeremy found himself frozen. He didn’t know what to do and he couldn’t see a way out. “Maybe if you’re really good for me I can take you home and treat you really well. Warm clothes, good food, all the free pleasure you can ask for.” 

Jeremy was seriously freaking out now. He could feel his chest contracting and couldn’t force air into his lungs as the hands returned, this time roaming his chest and neck. He tried to force words out around the lump in his throat, but all that came out was a whimpering sound. His eyes watered, and the whimpering increased.

“Shhhhh…” He whispered, biting and pulling on Jeremy's ear, “Relax Jeremy. I've got you. Just enjoy yourself baby. I'll take good care of you.” 

Howard continued to whisper about the awful things he wanted to do to Jeremy, things he knew would wake him with nightmares for years to come, his right hand started getting lower. As the his hand got to Jeremy's beat, he felt himself kick into overdrive. The frozen feeling from before was gone, and he was hyper aware of everything in the car. Including the knife that had fallen out of his pocket as he was thrown into the backseat. 

He knew what he needed to do.

Pushing himself up, Jeremy managed to dislodge Howard, throwing him into the door and disorientating him. Jeremy surged into the front, and managed to grab his switchblade before hands once again pulled him back. This time, however, Jeremy twisted as he was being pulled and opened the knife. As he turn, he slashed, catching Howard by the shoulder. It wasn't deep, but it had Howard rearing back in shock, a thin bead of blood beginning to gather on the shirt around the slash. Jeremy goes after him, bringing is knife down hard on his chest, he felt it hit bone. As he removed the knife in order to bring it down again, blood soaks through the shirt much quicker. 

Jeremy isn't even thinking anymore. He brings the knife down again and again, until the words in his heads quiets down some and the screaming putters off, dying into a sore scratchy sound. It's at this moment that Jeremy realizes that the screams were his own, throat dry and I'm pain. He scrambled away, going out the back door, opposite to the body. He gets out and begins to walk back towards the bulk of the city, his mind wandered back to what just happened, and it hit him all at once. Running into an ally, Jeremy emptied the pitiful amount in his stomach, tears returning to his eyes as he realized that not only had someone try to force themselves into him, but at 13 he became a murderer. Dropping the switchblade, Jeremy ran the whole way back to his self proclaimed bridge, unable to see and not truly processing the run. When he got back, he grabbed the few possessions he has, just a blanket, a small pillow and a backpack with two changes of clothes. Jeremy then fits over to a small, slightly more sheltered area, closed in on 3 sides and tries to get some sleep, letting the world fade out as he faces the only way to get out. Some delusional part of himself was worried that Howard would come for him. Worried that the cops would find him.

* * *

“Jeremy… That’s… That’s awful…” Gavin said after the story was finished.

“Yeah… Well… They never found out who had killed the man between the abandoned buildings.” He said, his laugh a little wet as he wiped at tears he hadn’t even realized he had cried. “A part of me always wondered if it was because they realized what Howard had tried to do, or if they legitimately just couldn’t figure it out.”

“In this city… Both are plausible.” Geoff said. “The pigs are idiots, and if they do manage to figure out that something illegal was going down… They don’t give a fuck.” 

“Yeah… To be honest completely honest… That night… It unlocked something in me. Made me realize the power I held and I… I never did look back… I guess it was a little helpful in that regard.”

“Well,” Ryan said, placing his hand on Jeremy’s shoulder. “At least one good thing to come out of it was that it lead you to here.”

“Yeah… I guess I’m pretty lucky in that regard…”

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed. Feel free to live a comment, let me know if there are any mistakes. I have read it so many times, I think I got all of them but if not, drop me a line. 
> 
> *Finger guns*  
> Agent Nevada out!


End file.
